Create an Environment of Success

We can help our children be successful by helping to create an environment of success for them. What does that look like? First thing is to make sure that you, as a parent, have the proper resources to help you. There are a number of different places that you can go.

First of all, you can Google and you can search “parenting an ADHD child” or someone with anxiety or depression. You could Google what the typical symptoms are and start to familiarize yourself with what the typical traits of somebody who has ADHD are. 

Second, you can find a friend who has ADHD or somebody who is parenting an ADHD child. Creating a network or support system of other people who are going through something similar or can give you some insight as to what it's like to have ADHD can be really valuable. It will allow you to be able to have empathy for your child as they have certain situations that might be really hard for them, that maybe isn't hard for you at all. 

Third, work with your schools. All public schools are required to provide special ed services for those that are in need of it. There are two main types of accommodations within a school. The first one is a 504. And the second one is an IEP. Depending on what your situation is will determine which one of those might be best for you or your child. Talking to your special education teacher is a really great way to get more resources and information and ask them questions.

Fourth, find a really good group of doctors to be on your team. Whether that be a therapist, psychologist or even a psychiatrist. It took us quite a while to find a good group of doctors that we worked really well with. When Emily was younger it was actually draining and completely exhausting. We went from doctor, to doctor, to therapists to psychologists to all of these different people and then we would find one that we liked, and then they would be retiring, or they move to a different practice or no longer took our insurance or things like that. It felt kind of defeating for a couple of years. When you find the right group of doctors to help you, your support system grows. These doctors understand how the brain works and can help you to come up with successful routines and habits. 

Fifth, one of the best pieces of advice that a doctor gave me is that you need to allow your child some time to be able to decompress. Being at school all day and working so hard to hold it in and show up the way that they're asked to show up is exhausting. When they get home, they need a safe space where they are allowed to decompress. 

Sixth, find some Facebook groups. See what other parents are saying. Seeing what kind of struggles others are having can be really validating. Pick and choose which ones you want to join that are the best for you. I personally like to look at ones where we're trying to find a solution with, but at the same time, I have a total respect for somebody just needing an outlet of being able to say, “this is how I feel and this is hard.”